For the 2010-2011 school year, I worked as an English Teaching Assistant assistant d’anglais in Niort, France as part of TAPIF (Teaching Abroad Program in France). I primarily worked at the Lycée Jean Macé, which also provided an apartment for me and the Spanish Teaching Assistant, Mary Cruz. We were pretty lucky that our high school provided our apartment. Our rent was very cheap (although our utilities were insane), it was right next to the lycée, and it was very big by French standards. Mary Cruz and I each had our own bedrooms. We shared a bathroom, kitchen with dining area, and large living room. Plus it was completely furnished with cast-offs from teachers and past assistants over the years.
Niort is a primarily urban, medium-sized city in the Deux-Sèvres region département of France. We lived right next to the high school and a grocery store, both of which I could see outside my bedroom window. It wasn’t the most interesting of views, but it was certainly exciting when the students went on strike grève.
The views from our kitchen and living room were equally bland and commercial. While our apartment was a convenient ten-minute walk from the city center, our street wasn’t that exciting.
But during my seven months in Niort, I enjoyed some of the most beautiful sunsets of my entire life. With an old, cheap camera, I did the best to capture the painted sky, but none of my photos compare to the picture God gave me.
I tried always to focus on the positive. I tweeted about the delicious, inexpensive wine I was drinking. I blogged (at my livejournal… don’t laugh) about how great my students were. I posted travel pictures to Facebook. I didn’t mention the extremely tight budget I kept, living off less than 800 euros each month. I didn’t share the repetitive meals I ate to save money. I never talked about how lonely I was most of the time, being friendly with the other expats and some French locals, but not feeling close to any of them. I joked about hand-washing my laundry all year, leaving out my dry, cracked skin that took months to heal. I tried really hard not to let on that Mary Cruz and I didn’t get along well.
After a year in Le Vésinet, which certainly had its own challenges, being in Niort was hard. I didn’t just miss everyone in the States, but I missed my cousins in Saint-Germain-en-laye, my fellow au pairs, and Paris.
But I adapted. I realized you don’t have to be best friends with people to have fun with them. I stopped feeling left out when other assistants got together, and I started inviting myself to stuff. I reached out to other assistants who were quiet. I skyped with my best friend Sally, who had struggled working as an assistant the year before. I fell in and out of love with my best friend McPhee with our daily phone calls. I watched too much TV, I wrote a bunch of short stories, and I read a million books. I joined OKCupid, suffered through one awkward encounter, got tricked into a first date with a pretentious academic, and kinda sorta dated another assistant.
I learned how to be happy alone. I found contentment with myself.
God revealed the light in the darkness.
She taught me to find the colors amidst the gray.
Everything I loved about my time teaching in Niort had always been there–I just had to find a different kind of happiness.
My two years in France were two of the best of my life. Not because they were easy, or filled with adventure, but because they challenged me to become a better woman.
Thank you Emma, Kelly, and Rebecca for the prompt, “Room with a View.” This post took a totally different direction than I’d planned, but sometimes writing reveals truths we never even realized.
My first flat in London was similar in that it was commercial and fairly gross. (It was especially gross on the inside.) But with the excitement of being abroad, or of being somewhere you really want to be, it becomes easier to overlook things like that! (I had a livejournal during that era as well:) ) x
I WANT TO READ YOUR LIVEJOURNAL!
Please? 😉
Haha, I totally would let you but last year I had to suspend my account – I wanted to go back and read some old posts for a lark and couldn’t get in. I had lost my password and the password reset was linked in a middle-school era email address that had been long sine deleted. I emailed the tech and site administrators explaining the problem and saying that I’d prove my identity some other way, but they wouldn’t budge. (Which is good for the safety standards there!) The only option they gave me was to suspend the account 🙁 x
Oh no! That’s so sad 🙁
Hi Brita,
I had similar experiences while I was an assistant in the Saint-Etienne region from 2009 to 2010. I didn’t find a permanent place to live during my first two months! I stayed with several couchsurfers who were really great people and made me love the French!
I finally settled on a house with an older gentleman. It was great and I had my own room, and he cooked great food since he is a co-owner of a restaurant. However, I felt lonely being out in the suburb of La Fouillouse. I ended up moving in with a French girl. That was better since we were in the middle of town, but it was quite noisy at night since there was a plaza of restaurants, lol. Yeah… adjusting to where you live takes a while.
Well, I feel like you that living abroad has great benefits, but also teaches how much you must accept difficulties to enjoy the whole experience. You also learn to not hide the difficulties and to be honest about them. I guess everyone hides the whole truth and focuses instead on the happier things. Doing so makes life better.
Will you keep on traveling? I want to go back to France to see the dungeon where Toussaint Louverture died. I’m half Haitian, so I love exploring my family’s history, since we barely know anything, lol.
A plus,
Aaron
I spent Christmas Eve 2010 in Saint-Etienne! Almost everything was closed, but my friend and I managed to find a pizza place for lunch.
Seeking contentment amongst challenges was my greatest lesson. I don’t always have to live the most exciting or super-happy life to be content. I manage the difficult parts and move on.
Traveling is a bit harder now that I’m married, but yes, I will! My husband and I honeymooned in Puerto Rico back in March. We have a tentative trip planned to France next June, during the 24 Hours of Le Mans.
I’m 3/8 Norwegian, although my Norwegian ancestors came to the States in the late 19th century. We’re still in touch with our relatives in Norway, though. I find family history fascinating, even when it’s just a long line of farmers!
Bisous, Brita
I love the sheer variety of musings that a set topic can inspire – you sound like you had quite a challenge to overcome!
Yes, and now that I have a quiet night during our vacation, I can finally go back and read what other people wrote! I’ve been “linking and leaving” with several link-ups this week, just because I only have 15 minutes here or there to be online. I can’t wait to see how the topic inspired other travelers!
Awww, I know what thats like and how difficulties make you grow, but you still look back on ‘bad times’ as ‘good times’ as a result. You sound like a brave soul.
It’s funny, because my first job in France in Le Vésinet was extraordinarily stressful, to the point that I lost weight from not being able to eat, but I still think of it as one of the best years of my life because of the good times I spent with the three best friends I made.
Gorgeous colours in your photos. I love how your years in France really challenged you to do things a bit different and spend some quality time with yourself. Travel is amazing for that.
Claire xx
I even traveled by myself for the first time! I’m incredibly blessed to have had the opportunity to live abroad and become who I am today. Thanks for commenting!
That’s a very excellent thing, to be able to look back on a really tough season and say that you really learned and grew and became a better person for all of it–even when it wasn’t fun at the time. I can relate to the apartment, though–I’m teaching in China right now, in an assigned apartment furnished with the left-behind belongings of previous teachers–yes, it’s “home” for me, but I admit it’s a little on the ugly side.
You’ll have to blog about your apartment at some point. There are always little ways to make it feel like “home.” I became quite attached to a large, chipped yellow mug for my tea. 🙂
Thanks for commenting!
Good for you for sticking with it and making the most of a challenging time – travel is amazing for making us realise that we’re capable of so much more than we thought! Love your photos as well 🙂
Living in France definitely challenged me, but my two-ish years working there helped me become the woman I am today. Thanks for commenting!
Thank you so much! It’s reassuring to hear that I’m not the only one who struggled abroad. I think we tend to focus on the high points because that’s what other people want to hear, but personal growth comes from surviving the low points. Thanks for commenting!